10342409_263632440489649_8990175504611864251_nWe can experience loss in many ways in our lives. It can be loss of health, youth, relationship, job, a loved one, or even the loss of the hope that the something good you thought was going to happen to you will never materialize—promotion, marriage, having a child. When you experience loss on any scale you will usually have some sort of grief response, varying in degree of the severity of the wound that the loss has created in you. Severe loss and wounded-ness create an extreme grief which feels a lot more like being crazy than sad. Just crazy!! If it were only sadness, it might not be so gut wrenching. But as hard as that “caught in the throat” deep sadness is with the cry that just won’t come, grief is, alas, so much more complicated and confusing than that. It’s more like being smashed with one contradictory feeling after another. Grief is sad and afraid and relieved and ashamed, and guilty and joyful, and enraged, and confused, joyful, grateful and relieved again and then here comes guilty!! And then always . . . exhausted! Grief tumbles onto to you with one overwhelming wave of rawness after another. No wonder so many of us push grief down or deny it, or postpone it, or retreat from it, or put it in a box, or read about it anything at all other than have it.   Because it feels like your inner bindings are ripping apart. But as you continue to experience your grief, you may discover that joy does sometimes come. It’s the joy of a rebirth of something different coming alive inside you.

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